2 girls there, not here anymore... but seem like here also... mind-confused;heart-tight

Sometimes, I'm not clear about myself... Isn't it I don't have any position within? because I'm male? I can't be treated normally?

Any little talk seems like no more space to me involve in, feeling like I have been chased out there...

Too many things are there, but none of those I have the right to involve, I don't have the right to talk even!

Too many things hiding from me! Too many things hurting me! why? i also don't know lo... feel like myself to stupid!

Haiz... In fact, where is my right to involve? There are girls, you're boy! Keep yourself back, don't ever go there, stay everything out, don't bother, don't hear, don't care... Back to myself without having any relation with them... That is solution for this moment only I can find back myself. That is the way for this moment only I can live better.

Back to here... Don't go there... Don't care there... because I don't have the right to be with there indeed. Because no matter how good I be for them, I'm just different with them, I'm just not having right to involve within 2 girls in kampar. Because they are girls!!! I'm BOY!!!

Moment

"Moment" this word is really best to describe feelings or mood.
Sometimes, when you don't know how to be yourself or lost out yourself, it will last only in a moment.
Well, within a moment, you have many choices... Well, for me... I prefer push away all those choices and create mine one, i.e. stay at the same frame of mind, having my own thoughts... That would be more comfortable.

I have bad moment, good moment, terrible moment, bored moment, great moment, or even don't have time to stay in a moment.
I prefer to set a moment to myself, only me without others. The moment consists of my world, my thoughts. I love the feelings when I aligned with everything in this world. Having same state of mind with the world. Saying inner world talks, talking to the world is actually talking to myself.

When the busy life can't get away from you, I prefer get myself away from the busy life. Because my moment is my essential moment, I can't live without it and I can't breath without it.

The best thing I ever felt is talking to myself.

Alone? No! I'm talking to myself!

People might think that I'm crazy, I think that you're stupid.

One without his/her own space of moment, you're no longer yourself.

Sometimes, I'm thinking that this is a place where nobody is allowed to go in. My thoughts are mine, not yours. My thoughts are unique. I'm my thoughts.